For those of you who haven’t seen, #dearme is a hashtag on YouTube where you give a message to your 13-year-old self. I thought it might be fun. But I don’t do videos, so I wrote it instead.

Dear Me,


Don’t worry, moving to Ohio is the beginning of your life, not the end. When you’re nearly 30, you’ll have lived in Utah twice as long as you ever lived in OH, and you’ll still claim it as your home state. There are amazing friends in store for you there.

Try not to blush because a boy looks at you. For real. Boys are just people, and the ones who turn you pinkest have names you won’t even remember in 17 years. They have absolutely no bearing on your adult life, so who cares what they think?

Do better in school. You’re smart, but the fact that you don’t work very hard is going to bite you in the butt when you get to college. Also, keep your room cleaner. That whole housework thing is going to be a shock to your system. Do things you don’t want to do now, otherwise you’ll still be struggling with this stuff when you’re 30. There is no magical fairy who comes to do your work for you. You work, and magic happens.

Don’t stop reading. Consume those books. Live in those stories. Love the characters. Absorb it all. When the time comes to write–and you will write (surprise!)–that lifetime of stories and love of words will become the foundation of your dreams.

However, maybe ease up on the novels where the heroine tearfully declaims a heartfelt monologue that causes the hero to realize what an idiot he’s been and embrace her passionately. The kind of men you date don’t really get heartfelt monologues. Sorry, your husband is great, but he doesn’t either. 🙂

Speaking of guys, stop worrying so much about marriage. You get there, and it’s great, but for goodness’ sake, enjoy the time you have to hang out with your friends and be young and single. Trust me, you don’t have as long as you think.

Never assume you know everything. There are two or more sides to every argument. Facts are not always as factual as they seem. Don’t ever judge. Have compassion. But don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself. You are smart. You are not hideous. You are not fat. In fact, maybe learn to love exercise so I don’t have to. I’d appreciate it.

Your life won’t turn out how you expect, but there are happy things in store you can’t even imagine. Love yourself. Respect yourself. Don’t be afraid to know that you have worth. Keep moving forward. I think you turn out okay.

Good luck!



About Caitlyn McFarland

Mom of three girls, writer of fantasy novels.
This entry was posted in Just Life and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to #DearMe

  1. Pingback: #DearMe | Bleeding Ink Inc

  2. Leah says:

    Well said, dear friend.

  3. Amanda P. says:

    This is when we met 🙂 days I will always remember!!!

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